Saturday, February 13, 2016

Team Effort

I'm sure you've heard the phrase, "it takes a village." I mean to tell you this is the truth in my life right now. If I didn't have such a wonderful support system, I wouldn't be where I am today. I have had, as you know, a whirlwind of a few months. I have finally set the date for my closing (this Friday!!), I have the House Hunters formal offer letter, I have the job I'm currently working AND a few other opportunities I've been offered for down the road, and I am slowly but surely getting things ready to move into the new property.

With buying a new house, lots of other things have come up that of course cost ridiculous amounts of money. You're told, at the beginning, that your down payment and closing costs are going to cost x, but then more and more gets added on to this amount. I knew this before getting myself involved with the process of purchasing my own home, but you never really know what ALL will come to fruition. I get paid bi-weekly, which is great because in China it was once a month. Even with a set salary though, I still work my tail off babysitting and dog sitting because a) I love it b) it's great extra cash and c) I want to make sure I'm always able to have a little fun with extra funds.

As you know, while waiting to move, I've been staying with Mom, my friend Caroline, and another fab friend, Sarah. I've been house/pet sitting on IOP every other weekend for an amazing family and even my REALTOR had me "house sit" for her when she recently went out of town. I'd say that's above and beyond the call of duty! I'm tired of being a nomad, but I SO appreciate the help I'm getting from everyone, and having the flexibility to move place to place has been good because I don't feel I'm really outstaying my welcome anywhere (although others may feel differently).

Earlier this week, I transferred my downpayment from one account to my checking, and immediately I went out and bought a couch. Funds down, I started to panic because I knew I had to keep a certain amount in the bank to ensure there would be no issues with closing. I texted several great friends for whom I babysit and I said "Please let me know if you need anyone this week; I'm trying to keep my head above water." Side note...I'm not ashamed of asking for help. I like nice things. If I can solicit work to help me get those nice things, I'm all about it.

SO, because I have AMAZING friends, I got extra cash in a couple of days. One awesome lady said she'd pay me whatever I needed up front and let me work for her after. I haven't had to take her up on this yet, but what an offer! Another great friend is paying me ridiculous amounts for hanging with her children, whom I love to pieces and would totally keep for free. My mom even said she was sure that I was getting paid more just because they know I can use all the help I can get right now. Either that, or since moving to China, the cost for a babysitter has increased drastically. Either way, without these two fabulous Mom's, I might be terrified about the upcoming expenses.

I was paid again yesterday and so I was feeling good about money in the bank, but one of those "unexpected costs" came up at 4 pm. I was on the phone with the insurance people and I had to go ahead and pay one year upfront for my flood insurance. It wasn't a huge fee, about $415, so when he asked if I'd like to pay debit or credit, I went the debit route because I'm trying NOT to use my credit cards for anything until I can pay them off. As you know, when the cash is gone, it's gone, but I'm ok with that this morning too. Although disappointed I can't go get the gorgeous antique dresser I wanted today, I am proud that I made a decision to prioritize my spending. I still have to offset the cost of the refrigerator for the new house (the seller is giving me money to buy, but not enough money for the fridge I want). Oh, and I have to buy a washer and dryer too. Maybe Lowes low/no interest credit will work for this. ;)

One of my other goals for coming home (besides really catching up with friends and family) was to make some new friends...ahem, friends that might turn in to more. I'm not crazy like "I have to get married now," but I'm ready for this, and have been for a long time, if the right person comes along. I have totally been against the whole online dating thing because quite honestly, it freaks me out, but my friend Luke, an Irish guy I love and respect, talked me into a little app this week, so I gave in and enrolled. Immediately I had some connections and one person in particular started messaging. I have to write this next bit for your comedic relief (and this is not on the the guy at all because he was super nice and I'm excited to see him again), but here's the story of our first date.

We messaged a few times back and forth throughout the week and then, on Friday, I was out on a field trip with my kids when I received another message from him. I had told him that I was babysitting for my sister on Friday night so she could go to the Garth Brooks concert. He had mentioned earlier that he had tickets and was going also. Around 1 pm I get the message, "What are the odds of you finding someone else to babysit tonight?" I responded that actually I was free because I had mistaken the dates of my sister's tickets. He then asked if I'd like to join him, so I agreed.

I realized that I wouldn't be getting home from school until 3:30 or after and he had said he'd pick me up at 5 so we could grab a quick bite before the show. The funny thing of course was that he was going to pick me up from my mom's house, where I'm currently spending the week. The next thought was, "shoot, I don't have clean clothes." Living out of a suitcase means I have what I have, so I messaged Mom to see if she could throw some jeans in the wash for me, "Mom, any chance you could wash my dark clothes for me? I think I might have a date tonight..."

Mom wrote back that she would, but she wasn't home yet. There might have also been a response of, "A date?!" A few minutes later I got a text that my brother had stopped by Mom's house and he'd throw my clothes in the wash. Ok, so now the brother is involved. He writes me, "They just finished washing. I'll stick them in the dyer...what's the setting?" I'm dying laughing at this because I can recall ONCE in my life when my brother did my laundry before...Mom was out of town and he and Dad were taking care of me when I had my surgery. This was too funny.

I got home to my brother still at Mom's house and of course I thanked him for helping me get ready for my date...team effort and all. The story gets even better though.

My mother, after Daddy passed, decided she wanted to work some, so she took a job at the performing arts center and coliseum selling tickets, guiding people to their seats, etc. Guess what show she was working Friday night?

Mom heads off to work, I get ready, and my date picks me up. On the way, I tell him there's a chance he'll meet my mother and explain that she's at the show. He seems tickled by the idea.

When we find our seats, and get settled, I hear voices calling "Hannah," so I turn around and two rows back are some amazing parents of two equally amazing kiddos I taught at Stiles Point. Now I feel a little funny like maybe they'll know it's a first date and they're watching! I've got them over my shoulder and Mom somewhere possibly spying.

Meanwhile, my date, who seemed to get a kick out of the fact Mom is around, starts scanning the crowd trying to find her (but he's never met her so of course he doesn't know what he's looking for). I'm sort of on alert too, not out of nervousness, but just because I wonder where she is. I didn't have any luck finding her though, so my attention went back to the show. ;)

At one point during the concert, Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood sing a duet, and while doing so, there's a giant kiss cam capturing people sharing their affection. My date looked over at me and said, "We have to do it." Fortunately or unfortunately, we didn't get caught on tape so there was no awkward kiss on the big screen (with my mother possibly watching).

About 3/4 of the way into the show we spotted my mother, and I got all emotional because Garth sang some newer song called "Mom." My date was very sweet about it.

I had to giggle all night about the great team effort in getting me ready for my first date back in the states. Again, it's so nice to be home. There are a million reasons it's good to be back, and having support from loved ones is definitely at the top of that list. So house, dates, work, whatever life brings, I'm ready because I have a lot of Charleston backing me. Yay for home!

Saturday, February 6, 2016

Bittersweet Bliss

I've been home just under two months now and I have enjoyed every minute of my time with friends and family here in Charleston, but even now, I'm still feeling a twang of guilt for having left my babies in China.

In the little time I've had at home, I've found a house and begun purchasing items for it to make the space my own. I've purchased lovely Chinoiserie silk to cover my new dining room chairs. I've had my eye on Chinese corner chairs and chests for decorating. I've been to the Chinese grocery store at least twice to stock up on items I'm missing (tofu noodles and ingredients for dim sum).  I have planned to do my reveal (if I get chosen for House Hunters) with a traditional Chinese red tea that I brought from, well, you know where. It's really funny how China followed me home.

Last night, I took two of my favorite kiddos in Charleston to see the new Kung Fu Panda movie, and nut that I am, I cried the whole way through. "Oh dumplings," I thought. I'm a mess, really. FYI though, the movie is precious and not sad (except for maybe one or two parts, but it's all good in the end).

When we left the movie and drove back out to Wadmalaw where the children live, I sent them inside to get changed into pjs and I stayed out with the dogs for a minute. I couldn't take my eyes off the sky. There were hundreds of stars twinkling in that clear black expanse. I promise I will never take stars for granted again. I was so sad that I couldn't capture the beauty of that moment. I wanted to share that view with my students in China, because I know unless they've traveled far from Dongguan, they've never seen a sky like that.

This afternoon, I went to a new spa downtown called Salt. I hadn't really thought of the name before going for my massage. My sister had recommended it and my mom, since she gave me no birthday present in September when I was living abroad, offered to pay for my treatment. I walked into the space and immediately began to tear up. Salt lamps were everywhere. I was given a salt lamp when I lived in China...waaa.



Over the course of the last week or so, I messaged back and forth with two friends, both international teachers, as they debated what they'd be doing next year. I listened to them list the pros and cons of their options for the future. Belgium, Doha, Lithuania, Bangkok. As they went through the motions trying to decide what their next step would be, I felt a little jealous knowing that I'm not moving anywhere.

This statement will sound crazy to most of you because I am currently buying a house, but you have to know me, and know travel, to understand it.

For most people, buying a house would be a "trap" into staying in one place. For me, I think it'll be even more of a reason and an opportunity to travel. I am looking at getting out of the classroom and into consulting. Having my home base will be absolutely vital for my mental health (the short chakra cleansing meditation I did this morning is example enough of how necessary this house is to me).

As grateful as I am for all the wonderful people who have opened their homes to me in the last few weeks, having my own space, the type of space I design to help me rejuvenate after a long day, will bring even more positive energy into my life, and that energy will be shared with guests who visit through AirBnB and Home Exchange. There again, who chooses a house based on what they think their guests may like? That'd be me, and ask my casting producer, I did talk a lot about just that in my auditions.

These examples are a small glimpse into my daily life. Moments of pure bliss clouded occasionally by a bittersweet taste of sorrow...sadness that I no longer have what I did, but then, I realized something as I was driving today.

I DO have the best of both worlds. How many people can say in the last five years that they've lived in four different countries and visited countless more? How many people have made the vast number of friends I have or experienced the insane yet wonderful cultural differences of people from around the world? How many people can return to a place like Charleston, which I proudly call home, and jump right back into the swing of things almost, ALMOST, as if nothing has changed?

The most wonderful part of it all is that bittersweet bliss. I am thankful for the pleasure I find in the small moments here, and I am equally grateful for the memories I have from my time away. I cry a lot, but that's nothing new. The beauty is that my tears now are less painful and a more pleasant reminder that I am truly, unbelievably, and unquestionably blessed.